December, thank you for everything.

Puteri's 21st birthday :)

Barbecue,  just because :D

Christmas in Singapore :P

The month of December; The month of doing nothing :)

All kinds of thinking were kept to its minimum,

all kinds of entertainment were stretched to its maximum.

I had a blast this holiday, regardless of everything.

I am thankful for it, Alhamdulillah.

December. The month that I did nothing but lazed around town.

It's dark in here but I feel the sudden urge to write things here. Twitter can only swallow 140 characters and sometimes, we need more than that, you know. Right now, I need a pen and a paper or perhaps, a keyboard. I got the latter one. I'm good. 2010 is coming to an end. I don't know what about others but I close down my years with a big curtain. A good year should be remembered just the way that it is. A few good trips to the hospitals, never ending hang outs with good friends and family, great lessons and experiences here and there, flew around the globe to get a first hand experience on amazing things, rekindled some friendships and whatever kinds of ships, fell out of love ( I think and I hope so) and managed to stand n your own without the presence of your parents for a month.

I remember the years in my life with events, the ones that I've captured in my mind, the ones that I have engraved in my heart. I'm not a computer, I forget a lot of things but those things that touched you shall always be apart of you. I'm no angel like someone has said to me, sarcastically. I do sins and I pray for forgiveness from Allah. I have flaws and every year, or just every day I learn to improvise them. I am far from perfect. I can't walk on water. I don't float around on air. 

2011 will be just another 365 days for me to look forward to. There will a new journey that I'll embark on the very first month. I have no idea how it'll be like but I will try my best to do it, gracefully. I shall complain but perhaps, I will understand the real world better. 

Enough of rambling, pictures will be posted soon to show how my December looked like :)

Grey.

Calm as you always are, you stood there coyly, in blue.
I sat there watching you, reading every line that I could. 
I couldn't.
It was as easy as that.
I painted the holidays with every colour I could find.
But, I refused to paint it grey.
I can't interpret that vague little ordinary colour.
Perhaps, or just perhaps, I am tired of interpreting it.

Like a firework show.

I've written many posts that once I'm done with them, I'll just hit the "Save" button because I feel like I'm telling a story that is not important, that doesn't bring any meaning to anyone, even none to yours truly. So, sometimes, even when I've written more than half a page, I'll just delete them. All I needed was an outlet to let them out, if anyone reads it, that's a different matter. Just an outlet to speak up. 

I am left with 17 more days before my holidays end. Should I be worried? I guess so, but I am focusing on making the best of the last few days of this amazing year, 2010. When I say amazing, I mean amazing. Great stuffs happening at the beginning of it, in the middle of it, and now, we're reaching the end of it and I'd say, things that I didn't expect to happen, did happen. I don't wanna start emphasizing on what great stuff, but take it as I wrote it. Great stuff indeed :) No, I am not getting married. No, I didn't get a 4 flat. No, I didn't get an Audi. 

So, guys, enjoy your last bits of 2010. I managed to turn it around and had fun this year. How about you?

It flutters around.

It flutters around and kept making the sound, that sounded like nothing.

Those butterfly flew around freely, some in a garden, some in a building 

and some flew frantically in someone's stomach. 

I saw a white butterfly with black little spots,

I caught it with my bare hands, 

and I swallowed it. 

So, now I have a butterfly in my stomach. 

Does it flutter around in there?

I guess so and if only I have the guts to kill them, I will do so but sadly, no. 

I love 'em butterfly. 

#oldstuff 1

Put your feet on the ground and lift up your head high.

Keep your eyes straight and fix it right to the sky.

Forget your past and move on with your future.

Live it up to the greatest moment in your present.

Leave the past that gave you heartaches,

Leave the past that made you cried,

Leave the past that brought you down,

Leave the past that made you feel low,

Leave the past that ate you up inside and left you only sore bones,

Leave the past that made you felt a loser,

Leave the past that made you go haywire,

Leave the past that made you lost your appetite,

Leave the

March 6th, 2009. I can't even finish the sentence back then. 

I feel like I owe this blog a few posts. I can't write anything now, so I think I'm gonna start posting things that has been in my laptop for a while.

Batu.

Had a bucket full of rocks, I throw it all away.
Before I did, I browsed through it one by one.
Found one that I really liked, I kept it.
Carried it around everywhere in my pocket.
One day, I found a hole in my pocket.
The rock was gone.
The rock was gone.
The rock was gone.
If only I can find the same rock again.
I would kept it in another pocket.

Now, too many rocks in one paragraph.
They sound weird when you repeat it again and again,
but then, all word turns out weird when you repeat them again and again.

Thankful.

It's 1.28am with the sound of the fan accompanying me through out the whole night, along with Yuna singing 'Decorate' in my ears. It's been quite a day for me and quite a night. Here in Alostar, the night time comes at around 7.30pm or so, and up till the next morning, it'll be dark. My night was alright until around 9.30pm. It didn't need much words, just maybe one punchy line or so and the deed was done. Getting tired of it, its getting pretty old. 

I keep reminding myself, be thankful, be thankful, be thankful. God knows, how thankful I am, but maybe I don't show it enough but please do know, I am more than thankful to be born into this amazing world and I'll always be forever thankful for that. Just some times, when you think you've given everything, you know it'll never be enough OR maybe, I haven't given the best. I don't know. Like I said, its getting pretty old. I am getting old, day by day. 

Just a dream..

Everyday, my goal is to wake up early. As early as I possibly could  but I know those are just goals and dreams because I slept at 4am last night. Not that I had much to do, but catching up with friends, listening to new songs, watch any new videos, and played some games of Facebook(THAT boring Facebook). I know this is how my holidays will be like, since I have no proper holidays plan to go somewhere. I can't really say I love it to be doing  the same thing day in, day out but I'm not hating it either. 

I woke up at around 11.13am (not saying this with a proud tone) and had one of the most amazing dream, after lots of very plain ones, this was the climax of it all. So, I payed with phone and looked for ways, not to get out of bed. I lingered around till it was 11.56am. God, that was how lazy and happy I am to just lay around doing nothing and now here I am, looking for ways to enhance my days and make it more productive. Bet mom has got some chores for me to do, some errands for me to run for her. Wish I could be in Shah Alam right now, attend the SIFE AGM meeting. I miss the people in Shah Alam, oh God. Ahhh, one can never be satisfied right? When I am in Shah Alam, I crave of being here at home, but now I am in Alor Star, I wanna be in Shah Alam, but when I was in..... nevermind...

I forgot to bring my swimming suit, hence, no swimming activity for me. I brought back my running shoes but that seems like a big task. Hmmmmmmm. 

I better get my ass downstairs and start showing my face to Mom before she screams my name. Hihi. Those out there, who are sitting for their SPM, Goodluck girls & boys. You can do it!

I'd rather be a beast with a heart than a beauty with none.

FIll me in with workload, I need my mind to be occupied rather than thinking about things that I am not supposed to think about. 

2 nights in a row with thoughts that bug me like hell. 

It changed my mood, it changed my perspective towards.... Life.

If this keep on going, this holidays would be nothing but fun.