who am i kidding?

i woke up today with a restless feeling. can't help it but feeling down last night. what has happened last december should have been seen as a blessing in disguise and i am thankful for it. i have been admitting to people that i am fine and let me assure you, i am really fine, except for last night. how can i be fine when i know i can't dig in into a 19 year old boy's childish mind. the one that has been the root of all my complications.*Allah knows best* i am ready to bury it all behind by saying thank you for all the things that you have thought me earlier and thank you for being the biggest jerk i have ever known in my whole entire life. thank you for being there during the peak moments in my life and during my sorrows. lastly, i can't say thank you for the way you have been treating me, do i? you don't deserve it. i will never understand your quote ' we have to be cruel in order to get what we want'. i do get what i want sometimes but never have i been cruel in those terms in order to get what i want. grow up a bit. that's all i'm asking for. grow up and be a man. i pity those girls who will be your victim of words. thank god i am smarter than those girls. i was born with a brain and the least i could do is use it. i am not a fool for you and i have never been. *goodbye you selfish jerk* go bury your big head somewhere and pls, grow up

i really want want you to read this.