October, you were awesome last year.

So many things to say, I have no idea where to start. So, I guess by posting this picture, I can summarize things up. So, its obvious now that I fancy guys with a little bit of facial hair. Just some facial hair. Not body/chest hair. So, I think I should start writing serious matter now. So, I'll move on to the next paragraph now. 

One month into my final semester, things have been moving awkwardly slow. Other classes are complaining how busy they are and we can still run to the cinemas and karaoke lounges for some movies and singing actions.  I guess it is how you manage your time. Kekeke. Or maybe not. It all depends on which lecturer do you get this semester. As for now, I am thankful for the timetable and the lecturers that we got for our classes, except of course, for one particular lecturer that teaches one of our core paper *cough killer paper cough*.

And oh! The most important thing that I would to share here is...... the lifts at the Faculty are mostly under maintenance, hence the morning-stairs-climbing activity in order for you to get to class on time. It's a good cardiovascular exercise I reckon but frankly, if one wants to do it, one would have done it with a proper attire like sweat pants and sports shoes. Not slippers, cardigans and 7.9kilograms worth of Audit and Strategic Management colourful and cheerful notes. Oh, you noticed the sarcasm. Pardon myself. I am just annoyed with the fact that I am jumping from reading class to another one but of course, sometimes, the calculator made its appearance and of course, on the days that the calculator is needed, I forgot to bring it to class. Thus, I am still not a satisfied student. 

What else can I complain? Nothing much I guess. Life has been fine, with a few glitches, here and there of course.

Have a good weekend everyone. It's short but it doesn't mean you can't stretch it out :) 

A bit of everything.

I counted. I was home for 43 days and this marks my last night at home for this holiday. I like to do countdowns. Yes, I do. When I am happy, I count and when I am not happy, I still count. 

And this is my last night at home. 11 hours before, I was beyond excited to go back to Shah Alam. The idea of going back to class makes my heart tingle a bit and just the thought of climbing the stairs of Menara makes me want to dance a bit, instead of cringe a lot. But that was 11 hours ago, before I realized that I am leaving my little sister alone with my parents. An experience that I didn't have to go through while I was growing up since I had my other siblings and my cousins staying with me. She was being an angel today as I am still a bit down with fever. I had a glass of water and I wanted more. Just when I was just about to open my mouth, she went down right away and got me a glass of water. She's going to miss me and I am going to miss her. I love you, Adek ;-*

I am still excited to go back, though. Its a start of 6 months before I hit the end. Sucks just thinking about it. 

Raya was just like any other Raya but it felt like a really laid back Raya. We didn't go out to visit any houses around Batu Pahat but we managed to continue the legacy of sleeping after lunch. It was executed well as the ones at home had more space and the ones that slept at the hotel had air-conds. Haha. Alhamdulillah, my duit Raya collection exceeded its expectation and last year's benchmark. I guess, you ought to have a benchmark if this is your last duit raya :( And next year, would be the first year where I will be giving out instead of receiving it. Hmmmmm. There shall be a post on that one and how I feel about it. Hehehehe. Late night visits to Mamak and Ramly proceeded well and eventhough all of us have grown up to be tall and big, we still managed to fit into the same old Unser. Hehe. I'm so proud of all of you :) Other than finding out that I am allergic to squid this Raya, all other things are fine. 

What else? The holidays have been a good one. I don't think I did quarrel with my mom. I hang out with my friends on the nights that were possible for me to hang out. I like our last hang out the other day on the 8th of Raya, though it was like a partial gathering. 

It was a great holiday for me, indeed. This posts sounds like someone who was forced to write. I guess, I better write than wondering what did I do for the past 43 days. I did a lot of things, and some shall just remain in my memory :) 

Selamat Hari Raya.

Keep your brain sane because it's gonna have to function well this Monday. 

Peace!

Odd numbered night that fell on a Friday :)

The internet seems to be having a love hate relationship with all the members in the house right now. It'll appear for 30 minutes and then, it'll just magically disappear. It's not funny when you have typed lots of stuff or especially when you're bored. 

I thought we're leaving for Penang today but turned out, Mom still has got her hantaran to be settled. Hence, I am still at home. It's no surprise actually. Every year, Mom will be super busy one day before we leave for Penang. The house will be in a chaotic mode and everyone will be stressed out. I'm 22 years old now. I should be adapting well by now. The normal scene would be, Mom is still caught up with her craft work like Raya hampers, hantaran, flowers bouquet and sometimes, baby sets. Dad will just be like any normal dad. He'll be sending the car to the mechanic to check on the temperature, tires and stuffs. I will be handling the house, cleaning up, running all minor errands and the rest will just do their things like pack their stuffs and all. To bicker and argue or get scolded around this time, is a normal thing. People scream when they are tired I guess and especially when they are hungry. 

I dare not go out of the house during these times, though I really want to. Thank goodness I did go out yesterday and I've met with everyone that is available in town and wished them 'Selamat Hari Raya'. We should have taken a group photo yesterday but everyone was so hungry that everyone gobbled their food in silent mode. We enjoyed our seafood in such tranquility. Haha. Except for the 4 guys behind us, they talked non stop. Later on, Puteri joined us for drinks but our main mission to start the fireworks did not come true because AlorStar has been raining non stop. Its so cold right now, I might have thought that we're in London right now :P 

But all in all, it has been a great 26 days of Ramadhan. Up till this day, I haven't eaten any fast food for my buka puasa meal. How awesome is that?  And oh, before I forget, I would like to wish Hannah a happy 22nd birthday. This girl will be leaving us again, for the second time for London, again. Again, dude? London is not that cool alright? With all the riots, I hope you take care and rent a huge big room for me to come over and visit you :P 

Enjoy the rest of the Ramadhan, people! 

Am I the only who is not excited about Raya? Sorry cousins, but I am not. Having to go through the journey of visiting 3 states in 3 days? God, it is tiring. The only part that I am excited and looking forward to is, meeting the family members but other than that, the cleaning part, I am not thrilled about it.

I guess I should not be all selfish and think about the time that I have now, to spend with both of my grandmothers. I am, but thinking about the other things, makes me restless.

Tomorrow will be the last day with my friends before I make a move and leave for Penang, KL and Johor. I hope tomorrow will be a splendid day as we are going to Kuala Perlis for seafood for buka puasa. The plan after that is to play fireworks. Let's hope it all works out well.

Hope you guys are having enjoying the last bits of Ramadhan and just in case I don't have time to wish you, here it goes.

Selamat Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Batin. I really mean it :) Have a good hari Raya!

You got me.

Forever I will be envious of you,
To be getting a chance I never had.
To be his choice, when I was only his option.
To be his priority, when I was only his spare time.
To be his number one, when I was never even in his chart.
To be in his heart, when I was never even on his mind.
To be apart of his future, when I was only in his past.
To be apart of his days, when I'm only in it during the holidays,
And, to be apart of his plans, when I was never in it in the first place.

Envy, that was the word to describe all of it.
Happy, I really was happy for him.
Devastated, because I thought I was making him happy.

But, I never did interrupt. Never.
Forever I will be envious of you for being the lucky one to win over his heart.
Consider yourself lucky.
You had your chance but you let it slip.
So, just be thankful that you did
And stop blaming me for all your misery.
Because I never did.


God, things happened aeon ago. 

I bet Gordo didn't know about this.

Third post for the night, call me a freak. I don't mind. Last Sunday, Hilary Duff tweeted that it's her first anniversary with Mike Comrie and..... baby makes three! I basically grew up with Hilary Duff and this news means, Lizzie McGuire is pregnant. Hahaha. Some says she's a slut for being pregnant at 23 years old. Pfttt, the Americans. She's turning 24 next month. Get a grip of yourself. She got married first, the she got knocked up. Yeah, I am being defensive. It's Hilary Duff. 

So, congrats Hilary and Mike. I can't wait to see your little baby :) 

Ps : This is a compulsory post. Engagement, done. Wedding, done. Now, baby time. I feel like I'm going to be an aunt. A virtual aunt. Haha. What a way to show my bimboness. Woohooo! Pfttt!

Flipping through my old documents.

"Here I am, standing in front of a mirror. Looking through it, transparently.  Who I am now and who I was months ago, are two separate entities. I vowed to myself, with an open heart, that I’ll keep learning about myself. Not a promise I made to another soul, just a promise I kept to myself, quietly. A sense of independency I pride to have with less intensity in everything I strike to own. My pride is a priority in everything I do with an honor I hold on to, all the time. I am not willing to sacrifice my stands and beliefs. Rarely did I walk with a sorrow heart. My head held up high, always prepared for the undiscovered truth. Honesty does pay some days. Tightly, I grabbed those opportunity that stood perfectly in front of me, with no hesitation. I crumpled my devastation and threw it in a wide ocean. Little wisdom words accompanied me all the way in my journey of life. My heart stopped pumping a few times, due to some rare events. Never did I admit that most of the time, words eat me up slowly and deadly. My confidence level rolled like a ball.  Sometimes it is way up high, but most of the time, it is downwards. The world goes round, without the slightest doubt. I posed myself as someone who can walk and stand tall but little do they know, I’m crying inside like a baby. The world doesn’t view someone smart as gorgeous. I am far from pretty but at least, I have brains to back me up. I adore material things but clearly, life’s more than that. It’s just a way to measure your greediness when the rest of the world is suffering. Life is so much more than that. Wish I could change the world but I’m pulling my strength just to get through a day of chaos. The pretty people have an invisible pass to stay on top of the game and the opposite, oh well, more towards the end. Call me shallow or dumb,  that’s how the world works. I didn’t set the rule nor do I really play by the rule."

27 April 2010. 

11.53am.

A broken heart can do wonders. 

Time flies.

2.36am, 19 Ramadhan. 

Selamat berpuasa folks. Its a bit late, but at least we have 10 more days to go right? 10 more precious days to go in this holy month. Every year, I vow to myself that this Ramadhan will be better than the year before but I've been skipping my terawikh, I think I should be punished. I've got 10 more days to improve and I should be good. 

Frankly speaking, this Ramadhan feels slightly different or maybe, a lot different. I am at home for 30days and not just a few days. For the past four years, fasting month means dragging your lazy ass to class, being extra hyper when you go to the bazaar with your friends, dragging your full tummy to the mosque, waking up your friends and yourself for Sahur and blaming terawikh for the unfinished assignments the next day. Haha. And of course, copying your friend's assignment in class, the next day. 

I miss those times where we would drive to the mamaks and Nasi Lemak SS22 in PJ at the wee hours for sahur. I miss going to the bazaar with my classmates and not knowing what to buy on the 7th day of Ramadhan. I miss having gatherings during weekends with my family for Iftar. I miss seeing all the sleepy faces during Sahur. I miss having little gatherings with my Kedah friends especially since Ramadhan always comes around at the end of the semester, we are all tied up with work and to gather everyone is such a challenge but we always manage to pull through. I miss going to class and talk about what to eat and quarrel with my fellow classmates on who's turn it is to pick the restaurant. I just miss Shah Alam. And oh, I miss going to Masjid Shah Alam for terawikh and then we will all be swooning over the hot guys wearing baju Melayu and they all look so wangi. Hehe. Talk about killing two birds with one stone :) 

So, I think you get the point. I miss Shah Alam. I just wish that I realized that the last Ramadhan that I had with them was actually the last one that I'll ever have with them. I mean, it's the last one that we have while we are studying because like it or not, we are not going to see each other as much when the next Ramadhan makes an appearance. Just a sign that we are growing too fast. Too, too fast.

Urgh.

I am not in the mood because of the blog's layout. Should I make a new blog? But I love this one too much.

My advice to you;

Please don't be a jerk when you grow up because with that look, you can break lots of hearts little boy. I'll hold your hands forever if that is a promise that you're not going to be one :P